When a woman you like doesn't like you back, it drives you crazy.
You really want her, but you fear you will never have her.
Your brain spins around trying to come up ways to make her like you.
If a girl isn't reciprocating your affection, the good news is that there is a way to turn this situation around.
This article reveals something called "the *SECRET* pattern of interaction" that you can use to your advantage to make a woman get an urge to sleep with you:
The bad news is that it's very hard to break this pattern once it's settled.
One reason is that we are creatures of habit.
But the most important reason is that you're so dependent on this girl's VALIDATION.
See, you don't want to break the pattern because you don't want to break rapport. You need this girl's approval to feel good about yourself. It's like you're the little puppy and she's the mommy and you need her approval to have a sense of IDENTITY.
However, if you want to sleep with this woman and make her feel a strong attraction for you, you must first step out of your comfort zone, and do what needs to be done.
Because here's harsh truth is this:
If a girl isn't attracted to you, it's because she feels you are "lower-status" than her.
Moreover, she doesn't see you as someone she can be more than friends with... she doesn't imagine
getting romantic or sexual with you.
This is an image she has in her mind that you have to change.
How?
By doing things that break that image and make her think of you differently.
When you do behaviors that plant ideas in her mind and she starts imagining what it'll be
like to sleep with you, then she thinks "This guy isn't who I thought he was, he is different".
And that's when her image of you changes, and she starts feeling attraction for you.
In this video, Bobby and Rob reveal how to make a woman fall in love with you.
Now I will summarize the video. (For a more in-depth summary, go to this article)
There's always that moment when you're falling in love with that special girl.
Things are going well. She always responds to your texts, and laughs at your jokes...
But then one day you text her...
An hour goes by, she doesn't respond...
Two hours go by, and she still hasn't responded.
A whole day goes by and now you're seriously worried.
Finally she replies, but you can tell something is "OFF."
Her texts are emotionless, COLD, and she doesn't seem as excited to talk to you as she did before.
In your stomach, you get this feeling... that you KNOW something has changed.
This happened to me with a girl I was seeing.
We would text almost every day, until suddenly with no warning she stopped texting me for an entire week.
When this happens, what do us men do? We think "Maybe I didn't show her that I liked her enough... I should be more romantic"
But it's almost never that we didn't show our feelings enough. In fact, it's usually because we said TOO MUCH!
Oftentimes, the reason women lose attraction are the things you'd least expect!
When you show them you like them too much, you've become too predictable, they lose the spark they feel for you.
Why does this happen?
I'll share with you a little secret on the intriguing nature of female psychology.
If you have a bad habit of causing women to stop talking to you, because they feel you've gotten too boring and predictable... then pay attention and learn about the power of uncertainty.
How Uncertainty Makes a Woman Fall in Love With You
The more uncertain she is about whether you want a relationship or not, the more she's going to wonder about you when you're away.
On the other hand, if she knows you are a "sure thing", she know you're always there, and so she won't put any effort to win you over.
It's like watching a movie.
When you're watching a movie we've already seen, you already know the end of it, and it's not as exciting as the first time you watch it.
It's a bit more boring and predictable, so you flip the channel and look for something new.
The same happens with a girl when you become to boring and predictable. She flips the channel and looks for another guy.
However, when you know the behaviors that get women to wonder about you, you can get a girl so emotionally invested in you, that she starts falling in love with you.
In this article, I will talk about typical nice guy behaviors that make you suck with women.
In fact, a lot of it has to do with "social conditioning."
Mainstream society is notorious for giving us horrible advice on attracting women... and it turns many of us into nice guy "WUSSIES".
What Everyone Usually Says
Whenever we get advice from movies, or people you know, what do they typically say?
They say "You should just be yourself and everything will be just fine" or... "you should tell her how you feel"
That's the usual mainstream advice that you hear.
However, the advice"just be yourself" can be easily used as an excuse to avoid walking through fear... something that is crucial to evolving as a man. For example, of there's a pretty girl you're afraid to approach, it's very easy to justify "I don't feel like I'm being myself when I approach her, therefore, I will stay here in my comfort zone."
Similarly, the grand act of revealing your feelings to a girl will probably end in rejection if you don't understand how attraction works.
How does attraction work? Well let's first start by eliminating your nice guy mistakes.
If you follow the mainstream advice you hear in the media, you've probably turned into a nice guy... and there are mistakes nice guys typically do that cause them to lose girls.
Nice Guys Put Women on Pedestals
Never put the woman on a pedestal.
Nice guys do it, but what does it mean?
Putting a girl on a pedestal means you are giving your power away to her. You are trying to hard to be an approval-seeking pleaser, that you sacrifice yourself and let her have anything she wants.
You probably lost a few girls because of this. I know I have... and the hurt teaches us a very important lesson: Don't supplicate to women by putting them on pedestals!
Subtle Ways You Might Be Supplicating to Women
You probably are more aware of the obvious ways to give our power away to women, but what about the more subtle things that we do "automatically"?
There are subtle ways we supplicate without even noticing and it makes women lose attraction for us.
For example...
You're seeing a girl. She likes hip hop, while you like rock music. Whenever this girl gets in your car, she changes the radio station to hip hop music... and you just let her do this even though you don't like it.
Because in your mind, you feel she's more important than you.
Again, it's very subtle when this happens, but deep down, you feel that it's more important that enjoys the music, than you enjoying it.
Now chivalry and being cool is one thing. But this is about not putting yourself BELOW the girl in fear that she won't like you if you don't please her.
Instead, put both you and her on an EQUAL level
That's how to stop being the nice guy.
Another example...
You're at the bar and a girl goes up to you and says "Will you buy me a drink?"
Typically, there are two extremes guys take here. One is the nice guy who will eagerly buy her a drink. The other is guy who heard "stop being so nice, don't buy women drinks"... and so he comes off as a combative jerk.
What to do instead? Here's what you do...
When a girl says "buy me a drink" say "sure I'll buy you a drink, but first get us a couple of tables so we can sit and talk"
Again, you two are on an equal level.
Which means, if you're going to do things for her, she's also going to do things for you!
So if she asks for a favor... You make sure she also does something for you so she contributes!
Same goes for if she wants to change the radio station.
You say "I'll let you listen to Hot97, but only if you sing me the first verse of Bohemian Rhapsody."
Boom, you make sure she also contributes... so that you're not just this nice guy bending over backwards doing favors for the girl.
And when there's a nice balance of both of you doing things for each other, that's a great interaction.
Because want to know the secret to making a girl fall in love with you? It's INVESTMENT.
Look, if you can get a girl to invest and do things for you, then you're IN!
Because once she starts investing, she backwards rationalizes "I must really like this guy otherwise I wouldn't be doing all these things for him".
And this is secret of why "jerks" get girls.
It's not that he is "mean" to her and that the nice guy is "nice".
It's this... The nice guy = invests way too much on a girl while she does nothing The jerk = invests only a little, but knows exactly how to get a woman to invest in them (and women LOVE it when you make them work to win you over)
These are "romantic moves" men do that backfire on them.
Instead of the move conquering the girl, the girl loses attraction and the guy gets hurt.
Let's start with mistake #1.
Nice Guy Mistake #1: Sending a Girl Flowers or Giving Her Gifts
This comes from the line of thinking that you have to make the "big move" to show a girl how much you like her, and once she sees how much you like her, she will magically like you too.
However, nothing is further from the truth.
This mentality has failed countless men throughout mankind... and it's because of two reasons.
First, a woman becomes attracted to you as a result of the way you make her feel when she's around you. She likes how your personality makes her FEEL CHEMISTRY inside... she doesn't get feelings of attraction because of a particular gift you bought her.
That's why it's so important to understand how to make women feel attraction.
And second, sending gifts and flowers sends the wrong message.
Using gifts to lure women says to the world "I have nothing of value to offer with my personality... and I have no game... so I'm taking out my wallet and buying you this gift to make up for it in the hopes that it'll get you to like me."
I hope you understand this... because it's very important to get.
Now let's go over the next mistake.
Nice Guy Mistake #2: Confessing Your Feelings
This one goes like this:
As you start to really fall for your girl, the tension inside of you builds up until you can't take it anymore and you make the BIG MOVE of telling her you have feelings for her.
Then as the "moment of truth" gets closer and closer, you fantasize what her response is going to be like. You convince yourself that she's going to realize how romantic your gesture is and she'll confess her feelings back to you.
However, you are crushed when your girl gives you the "let's just be friends" talk. You feel worse when she says "You are so sweet... I know you'll find a great girl!"
This is what happens when you let your guard down and you let yourself revert into your "inner" WUSSY.
It turns out this is one of the common mistakes men make.
Once you start thinking "Na... this girl is different... she's SPECIAL!" ...you go back to acting like little boys.
Nice Guy Mistake #3: Being Too Available
The nice guy is always too available.
It's like his whole purpose in life is to be there for the girl.
However, women secretly hate it when you make them your purpose.
Women want you to ALREADY have a purpose. They want you to already be on a path in life, so that then she tags along on that path by your side.
When you have a life with a career, passions, goals you are striving for...
women love it and become intrigued by you.
Now let me tell you another secret.
Here's something to watch out for...
Women often try to see if they can knock you OFF your path to make HER your path. If you give in and sacrifice your purpose and instead make "pleasing the woman" your purpose, she will lose attraction and she won't be able to know why.
However, if instead, you don't budge and you maintain the course, she becomes even MORE fascinated by you.
This is exactly why girls are attracted to jerks. They aren't attracted because jerks are mean, they are attracted to jerks because they can't have them completely. They are too hard to catch!
Similarly, women are attracted to men who are so grounded in their purpose that they can't be caught.
I just went over 3 nice guy mistakes men make with women.
I explained why we make these mistakes, and why you lose women because of them.
Now the question becomes, "How DO I attract women?"
Fair enough, I just showed you what NOT to do so it's fair to ask "WHAT" to do.
Something you want to know is that there exists an "attraction blueprint" to make a girl chase you.
It has a lot to do with the fact that women feel attracted to men they feel they had to work for.
Therefore the more a woman invests to win you over, the more she will convince herself she is falling for you.
Towards the end of this article you'll learn the behaviors you must do make a woman feel she has to win you over... because she's constantly thinking about you in her mind (the beginning of the article covers the 3 nice guy mistakes I just showed you).
Want to know how to make a girl obsess over you? Then make sure you watch the video above.
In the video, Bobby and Rob talk about how to make a girl obsessed with you.
Now, I will summarize the video (for a more in-depth summary, go to this article)
In this article, I will reveal the secret reason women become so obsessed over the so-called "bad boys"... and the reason you're not getting the same results as them.
Hint: It's not that you're a good guy and not enough of a "jerk". Instead, it has more to do with mistakes that stop you from creating an "obsession" in women.
Let's start with a couple mistakes I see men make ALL THE TIME.
Mistake #1: Revealing Your Feelings
When it comes to attraction there's a "game" involved. You can't just rush in and spill your guts revealing how you feel. No, you have to play it right.
If you play this game correctly, you can get a girl to become INSANELY attracted to you.
Why does this game need to be played? Well, imagine that the game of dating is a movie. When the girl experiences this movie with you, you can't just reveal the spoilers within the first five minutes.
You can't do that because it will ruin the movie!
When you already know the ending of the movie before you watch it... how do you feel? It isn't exciting anymore... and you get bored.
Same thing happens with a girl who was interested in you but you ruined it by telling her your feelings and making it obvious that you already want to be her boyfriend.
She gets bored, and looks for a more exciting option...
If there was another guy chasing her who she also liked, she now starts giving him attention instead of you.
Now to be clear, when I say "revealing your feelings" I'm talking about "relationship" feelings.
Which leads me to the next wrong mindset men have...
Mistake #2: Acting Like You Want to Be Her Boyfriend Too Early
It's bad if you act like you want to be her boyfriend early on.
However, it's perfectly ok, and even RECOMMENDED... that she knows you want her sexually.
This is because a man with many options doesn't try to rush into a relationship with a girl he barely met a week ago. This follows the principle of ABUNDANCE: When you act like a man of many options... you naturally act in a way that triggers attraction in women.
If you have abundance (many options)...
1. You don't mind being bold and taking risks by communicating to women that you want them sexually, and...
2. It takes time to win you over as a boyfriend.
Remember this, don't act like you want to be her boyfriend... act like her LOVER.
You agreeing to be her boyfriend is the PRIZE that she works to obtain.
This follows the principle of INVESTMENT: A girl who puts in effort to win your attention convinces herself that she is attracted to you.
Pre-Selection is the principle that girls are attracted to guys they think other girls are attracted to.
Whenever a girl sees that other girls are interested in a guy, it's like they have "proof" that the guy MUST be attractive, otherwise women wouldn't act that way around him.
Ever had a girlfriend and then noticed other girls were into you and you were like where the hell were these girls when I was single? This is the phenomenon of "pre-selection with women".
The same happens when we see an ugly guy with a pretty girl. We assume has has good game.
The good news is that, when they at first meet you, girls can't actually tell if you have "good game"... they only go by the superficial signals they get from you.
This means that you can use pre-selection with women to give off "I have good game and am wanted by other women" signs, and the girl will become attracted to you.
However, many guys don't realize it, but they give off "I don't get many women" signs.
And this is horrible for their success with women.
Ways Men Give Off "I'm Not Wanted By Women" Signals
1. Facebook
If you look at the pictures of that hot girl in your circle of frames... you'll
always find that guy who's the first to comment on her
2. Texting
If you text too much, send long texts, and get into long conversations, the girl will think "this guy is just sitting around waiting for me to text him... he's got nothing else going for him in his life"
Phone Tip
That's why it's a good policy to put your phone in silent and not check it for a few hours when talking to a girl you have a crush on.
The Ultimate Way to Give off the "I Am Wanted By Other Women" Vibe: Use the Cat String Theory!
This is the idea that women are like cats chasing a string. As long as you have the string in front of her... she will chase it. However, the minute she gets the string she starts getting bored.
You are the string. If she senses she got you too "easy"... she will get bored and stop feeling attraction for you.
That's why you must remember this:
BE the prize. Even though they might act like it sometimes... women don't want to be the prize... They want you to be the prize so they are chasing you to win you over.
This is the principle of "investment"...
Meaning: The more you can make a woman put in effort and do things for you, the more she will feel convinced that she's trying to win you over and this will cause her to become attracted to you.
When a woman tells you she's not ready for a relationship, you have to get things right.
This is a critical moment in time that determines the future of the relationship.
What you do next, and the way you behave determines whether you take the "relationship" to the next level... or whether she loses attraction for you.
What Most Men Do When The Girl They're Seeing Says She Isn't Ready For a Relationship
Look, a woman you're seeing will at one point or another go at least slightly cold.
The reason has nothing to do with you. Women are emotional creatures that sometimes need space to themselves to work feelings out. It has nothing to do with you!
she says she doesn't want a boyfriend right now
The problem is when men think something is "wrong" when the woman goes distant.
When he sees her fading away, what do his instincts tell him to do? CHASE CHASE CHASE.
Instead of giving her space, he crowds her more.
She realizes he's dependent on her. She senses he lacks strength to hold his own without her attention "validating" his self-esteem... and because of it she loses attraction.
So when a girl says she's not ready for a relationship, the inexperienced guy tries to find ways to convince her even MORE to get in a relationship with him.
What's more, he compensates by demonstrating his "good potential boyfriend" qualities as an attempt to sell himself as relationship material.
This is actually the wrong way to go about it.
Because once you aim to show her your good boyfriend qualities, to stop creating the attraction required to make her fall in love with you over time.
She doesn't "fall in love" with you by analyzing your good boyfriend qualities and becoming logically convinced that she should be your girlfriend.
No. She falls in love EMOTIONALLY because you're acting like a lover that hits on her emotions and makes her think of you when you're not around. (This deserves to be a post on its own)
How to Make Her Want a Relationship
There is a natural process a woman goes through in her mind before she decides she wants to be in a relationship with you.
People often say "men enjoy the chase"... but women secretly don't want men to chase them. Instead, women want to be the ones who win over "their" man.
A woman wants to be the one who puts in the effort to "lure" the man and get him wanting to be her boyfriend.
When a woman realizes she is putting in effort and investing in you, her mind backwards rationalizes "I must really like this guy, otherwise I wouldn't be investing all this time in him."
In psychology, this is called the principle of "effort justification".
On the other hand, if she feels a guy is too "easy", she quickly loses attraction. That's why guys who throw themselves at women typically get the "friend zone."
He isn't a challenge at all. She feels like she's already got him!
This is why you shouldn't get into "relationship mode" too quickly.
Instead, this is what you should do.
Only focus on being a LOVER at first.
At the beginning when you first start dating, only focus on hanging out, hooking up, and having fun.
Don't bring up any "feelings" talk or relationship label talk... only focus on the present moment and creating fun opportunities for sex to happen.
Make a date once a week, and as time goes by, she will slowly fall in love with you.
Here's why:
Because when you are relaxed, confident, and non-needy of the outcome, you can easily have fun and this creates tons of attraction.
This is the behavior that gets a woman fantasizing to be your girlfriend.
She will start wondering if she's the only woman you're seeing... or if she's your favorite... and then she will want to win you over! (Remember effort justification)
And if you get a woman really thinking about you when you're away... you've GOT HER!
So what will she do? She will start bring up the "relationship vibe." She will start asking you "so... what are we?"... and then you can decide whether or not you want to be "official" with her.
But have patience... be independent of the outcome... and remember to be a LOVER first, boyfriend later.
That's how you make a woman want a relationship with you.
If you're ever in doubt, consider this a guide of what to do when a woman tells you she's not ready for a relationship.
